All of Shakespeare’s plays.
Nay, then, thus:
We came into the world like brother and brother;
And now let's go hand in hand, not one before another.
That's a question: how shall we try it?
Methinks you are my glass, and not my brother:
I see by you I am a sweet-faced youth.
Will you walk in to see their gossiping?
No, none by me.
And I with him.
I, sir, am Dromio; pray, let me stay.
Ay, sir, but I am sure I do not; and whatsoever a
man denies, you are now bound to believe him.
No, trust me, sir, nor I.
Ourselves we do remember, sir, by you;
For lately we were bound, as you are now
You are not Pinch's patient, are you, sir?
Within this hour I was his bondman sir,
But he, I thank him, gnaw'd in two my cords:
Now am I Dromio and his man unbound.
Sir, he dined with her there, at the Porpentine.
Will you be bound for nothing? be mad, good master:
cry 'The devil!'
Master, I am here entered in bond for you.
And, gentle master, I received no gold;
But I confess, sir, that we were lock'd out.
God and the rope-maker bear me witness
That I was sent for nothing but a rope!
Money by me! heart and goodwill you might;
But surely master, not a rag of money.
In verity you did; my bones bear witness,
That since have felt the vigour of his rage.
Certes, she did; the kitchen-vestal scorn'd you.
Sans fable, she herself reviled you there.
Perdie, your doors were lock'd and you shut out.
Sir, sooth to say, you did not dine at home.
Mistress, 'respice finem,' respect your end; or
rather, the prophecy like the parrot, 'beware the
I am an ass, indeed; you may prove it by my long
ears. I have served him from the hour of my
nativity to this instant, and have nothing at his
hands for my service but blows. When I am cold, he
heats me with beating; when I am warm ...
I would I were senseless, sir, that I might not feel
Nay, rather persuade him to hold his hands.
Nay, 'tis for me to be patient; I am in adversity.
To a rope's-end, sir; and to that end am I returned.
I'll serve you, sir, five hundred at the rate.
Why, sir, I gave the money for the rope.
Here's that, I warrant you, will pay them all.
I buy a thousand pound a year: I buy a rope.
A crow without feather? Master, mean you so?
For a fish without a fin, there's a fowl without a feather;
If a crow help us in, sirrah, we'll pluck a crow together.
Here's too much 'out upon thee!' I pray thee,
let me in.
A man may break a word with you, sir, and words are but wind,
Ay, and break it in your face, so he break it not behind.
You would say so, master, if your garments were thin.
Your cake there is warm within; you stand here in the cold:
It would make a man mad as a buck, to be so bought and sold.
They stand at the door, master; bid them welcome hither.
If you went in pain, master, this 'knave' would go sore.
Master, knock the door hard.
So, come, help: well struck! there was blow for blow.
O Lord, I must laugh!
Have at you with a proverb--Shall I set in my staff?
Let my master in, Luce.
O villain! thou hast stolen both mine office and my name.
The one ne'er got me credit, the other mickle blame.
If thou hadst been Dromio to-day in my place,
Thou wouldst have changed thy face for a name or thy
name for an ass.
What patch is made our porter? My master stays in
Maud, Bridget, Marian, Cicel, Gillian, Ginn!
Marry, so it doth appear
By the wrongs I suffer and the blows I bear.
I should kick, being kick'd; and, being at that pass,
You would keep from my heels and beware of an ass.
Say what you will, sir, but I know what I know;
That you beat me at the mart, I have your hand to show:
If the skin were parchment, and the blows you gave were ink,
Your own handwriting would tell you what I think.
Am I so round with you as you with me,
That like a football you do spurn me thus?
You spurn me hence, and he will spurn me hither:
If I last in this service, you must case me in leather.
And he will bless that cross with other beating:
Between you I shall have a holy head.
Go back again, and be new beaten home?
For God's sake, send some other messenger.
Quoth my master:
'I know,' quoth he, 'no house, no wife, no mistress.'
So that my errand, due unto my tongue,
I thank him, I bare home upon my shoulders;
For, in conclusion, he did beat me there.
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